I'm a Christian, But......

Before I start this post I want to put out this disclaimer. I do not claim now and have never claimed to be a shining light of Christian purity. I would willingly admit that I often get things wrong and that I have made many mistakes past, present and likely in the future too. I also know that I myself am far from sinless despite my best efforts to be what I should be as a Christian.

Ok now I have said that I feel an awful lot happier about the rant I am about to go on. The thing I want to talk about is Christians who push themselves into positions of influence and set themselves up as supposed good examples who knowingly live in unchristian ways.

I doubt it is only me who has trouble with people who seek out positions of influence and power in the Church for their own means and then go on to act in thoroughly unchristian ways. I can't help but think that a at least part of the problems we have in the Church are in some way connected to the bad examples of leaders who are not there for God. In this I mean the people who need to be in these positions of power and influence for their own gratification and own purposes. These people who then go on to continue to act in worldly ways with inappropriate behaviour, gossiping and spreading rumours. This poison then permeates its way through Churches, in fact The Church infecting people further setting poor examples to those young or weak in the faith who perhaps then see this as acceptable behaviour.

As I said in the disclaimer, I do not believe myself to be an example of what a Christian should be, far from it. To be honest I would be willing to admit I fall far short of where I should be as a Christian many times. But without then trying to make myself sound any better, I do not claim to be a perfect example, I do not pretend to be anything but a sinful man daily asking the Lord for forgiveness. I pray that Christians would see the sin in their own lives, the gossiping, rumour spreading and general sinful behaviour and acknowledge it. By acknowledging it they can not only confront it and attempt to drive it from their lives but also show others that while sin is not ok or acceptable it is going to happen. Show that by having a relationship with Jesus and asking for forgiveness we can grow as Christians and in faith.

These people know that what they are doing is wrong, unchristian and hurtful, they know they are causing pain to those they wrong and who they gossip about. Rumours based on idle speculation, conjuncture and wild fantasy that they spread cause a level of hurt that is known only to the individual and the Father. When friends turn on friends and say things that are hurtful or cause situations where the truth is either veiled or hidden purposely for their own gain. When friends manipulate circumstances to gain an advantage over friends all of these things are a source of the pain that Christ felt upon the cross.

Paul's letters to the early Church talk about situations we still see today, brothers and sisters in Christ are still acting in ways that are far from Christlike and in ways we have be warned and instructed not to act. We are all going to sin, we are all going to make mistakes but I can't help but think that these people are claiming to be followers of Christ but have not accepted the Spirit, have not accepted Christ's forgiveness and are not following the two greatest commandments.

Matthew 22:36-40
When the Pharisees heard how he had bested the Sadducees, they gathered their forces for an assault. One of their religion scholars spoke for them, posing a question they hoped would show him up: "Teacher, which command in God's Law is the most important?"
Jesus said, "'Love the Lord your God with all your passion and prayer and intelligence.' This is the most important, the first on any list. But there is a second to set alongside it: 'Love others as well as you love yourself.' These two commands are pegs; everything in God's Law and the Prophets hangs from them."

What dreams may come

Last night I watched a film I have been meaning to watch for a long time but have never made the time to get round to it. It is a film I was made to watch while at school in RE while we were thinking about the Christian ideas of death and the after life. For a long time the reason I did not watch the film was because I could not remember the name, only that Robin Williams was one of the leads. But thanks to IMDb I managed to track it down and found out that it was called What Dreams May Come.

Essentially the film is about families and love and uses the idea of death and heaven as a back drop for which to base the story of true love conquers all. I have to say it is a decent film that is worth watching and at times I was glad to be watching it alone due to the effect it had on me. As I said although the film is set mostly in heaven and one man's journey from life into the after life and his relationships with his family this film is not about heaven or really that religious. The main idea of the film is how the main characters relationships with his various family members was in life and how looking at them from another point of view throws them into another light.

There are some powerful ideas and some emotional scenes in the film which highlight a number of common issues in life, father son relationships, family bereavement and falling in love. These scenes are powerful because they are issues we all have in our lives and we all have to deal with. The sad part of the film is that it takes the main character to die before he realises the mistakes he has made with his relationships.

Although this film does touch on some Christian ideas about death, Heaven and hell it does not faithfully stick to only Christian ideas on this subject. There are a number of spiritualist and other influences such as the idea of reincarnation. Although it takes the idea of Heaven as a place where we go after death it misses out on so much that we believe as Christians. In their idea of Heaven there is still pain and there are still negative traits such as ego and a need for justification. In the Heaven portrayed in the film God does not feature and there is no completion of the journey to discover Him and therefore the completion of our understanding does not occur.

Although I really liked this film and thought that there were some very good points to think on it saddened me to think that films like this maybe the only knowledge some people have on Christian beliefs on death and the after life. The film shows an incomplete picture of Heaven and a pick and choose vision of Christianity. In this world of multiculturalism and the mixing together of ideas we have to be careful not to allow our knowledge of God to become clouded by false truths, we have to ensure that we are clear on what Jesus taught us and what is in God's word. It is only through this knowledge and belief that we can shine as beacons for God, in this knowledge that we can complete our mission. If all people have to tell them of the Father are films like this then they will never enter onto the journey to find complete knowledge that is only found through Him. If they do not know of the journey we must all take they will never take up their cross to follow Jesus.

Those of us who have been called so far have a huge task to complete, a task that is huge and has major consequences. How are the world to know about Him if we do not go out and tell them? It does not require anything but faith in the Father and the acceptance of Jesus, your Saviour, in to your heart. If you have these two things then you are more than capable of doing God's work, He will make you everything you need to be, He will provide you with the courage, knowledge and words, He will never let you down.

Christmas is coming the goose is getting fat

There is an old rhyme I used to sing as a child;

Christmas is coming the goose is getting fat,
Please put a penny in the old man's hat,
If you haven't got a penny a Ha'penny will do,
If you haven't got a Ha'penny the God bless you.

It is just a silly nursery rhyme but for some reason it is one of the few I remember. I have no idea why I stuck in my mind so much, but I do have vivid memories of my Gramma singing this rhyme to my younger brother. But I do like the rhyme, even though it is a christmas rhyme which is about the trappings of Christmas with the geese and the ever present need for money to buy gifts. The best line however is the last one, it brings us back to the real reason for Christmas, God, specifically in the form of Jesus.

Last year we were blessed as a family to celebrate Christmas with a lovely 3 week old baby and a manic but memorable Christmas was had by all. This year it will all be a bit different, where as last year we had a lovely addition to the family, this year we will be missing two grand parents. Thinking about Christmas this year has been somewhat different for me in that all of the material things do not matter to me so much, and I have centred my thoughts on my family and the memories we have and of things with a sentimental value.

For me I think this is a lot closer to the real reason for Christmas. We are celebrating not just the birth of our Saviour but a family which he created. We are celebrating the fact that through Him we were all reconciled to God and that our family is now complete again with God as our Father. Although my earthly family is mourning a number of losses this year, we need to remember that they are not lost at all and that we will see them again when we reach the heavenly palace, when we are all born again through Jesus.

Christmas is a reason to celebrate, a time to realise what we have received, not just now, but also what we have received in the past too, the fact that we have been given Jesus and that it was the greatest gift of all. I have no idea what the people who read this blog will be doing for Christmas this year, but I hope that you can take a small amount of time to consider the baby who grew up and died just for you. Merry Christmas, I hope you have a God filled day.

Advent Challenge Day 23

This challenge is now complete, please feel free to browse all of the 

completed tasks via the Advent Challenge tab.

This challenge really has been a bit of a challenge for me, I know I have a lot to be thankful for but it is very hard to think of when we are all gearing up towards the first Christmas with out my Gramma and my Grandad.

But as I said, I know I have a lot to be thankful for and after spending some time reflecting on the things that will be missing this year I began to pray for the things I do have. The thing I am most thankful for is my family, after losing so many family members this year I am thankful for all the family I have left, specifically my nephew and Godson.

In addition to this I am thankful for the friends I have. These people have put up with a lot and been there for me when I have needed people most. My friends are a fantastic bunch of Christian people who really live out what they believe and who have been a great example.

I am thankful that I am blessed with a great job and the opportunities that it provides and the financial stability that comes from having a regular income for the first time in a long time. I am blessed to work in a challenging environment where I come in to contact with a huge number of different people with a range of issues to work with. It is a job that I enjoy hugely and have the opportunity to learn new things every shift and develop my skills and to grow as a person myself.

Most of all though I am thankful that I have come to know God this year. That through the examples and guidance of some fantastic saints I have grown to know the Saviour who was born at Christmas who went on to die that I might be saved. I am thankful that this year I will appreciate Christmas for what it really means, not just a time to look forward to presents and gifts.

The next task in the challenge will be task number 7. Attend a Christmas service. Check back tomorrow to find out about what happens in this task, but until then Merry Christmas.

Advent Challenge Day 21

This challenge is now complete, please feel free to browse all of the 

completed tasks via the Advent Challenge tab.

This task was one which was quite important for me to do for myself. The reason being is that this year has produced a number of people close to me who are going to find at least Christmas this year difficult. There are different reasons why people may find this season difficult, but I have worked out recently that most issues eventually boil down to loss or relationship break down.

There is another reason I wanted to do this task too, because the last two Christmas seasons have not been the most fun for me with one thing and another and I can appreciate people finding the season difficult to bear. I don't want to go into too much detail about specific people I prayed for in this task, although there are a number of them. All I will do is outline the rough ideas behind it, and hopefully it may encourage others to pray for those people in the world who struggle with the same.

The main area I prayed around was the people I know who have lost loved ones this year at some point, the people who will be spending their first Christmas without specific people there to enjoy it with. In addition to this I prayed about those who have lost people in or near the Christmas season in the past or whose loved ones who are now gone had strong connections to Christmas.

As well as this I thought and prayed about those people who find Christmas for other reasons, it could be they have financial problems and can not celebrate in the way they would like, the homeless or those seperated from their families for whatever reason.

I finished up by thinking about the armed forces of Christian families world wide who will be spending Christmas away from their loved ones due to wars or other military engagements. Specifically I prayed for the Children of the members of the armed forces who will miss parents over Christmas and who are unlikely to understand why their parents can not be there.

I know there are many other cases and situations of why people may find Christmas difficult, but it is hard for me to think and cover them all. Yet I have faith that God is aware of it all and although I can not articulate it all into one prayer He knows about it and has something planned for each and everyone who is prepared to accept His help.

The next task in the challenge is going to be task number 4. Help someone in need. Now I am not sure how this task will pan out, but I am at work today, hopefully, and I am sure that some opportunity for me to help someone above and beyond the call of duty will present its self at some point. Until tomorrow, Merry Christmas.

Advent Challenge Day 15

This challenge is now complete, please feel free to browse all of the 

completed tasks via the Advent Challenge tab.

Yesterday the task I completed was to pray for someone lonely this Christmas. This task for me is quite personal as the person who I have chosen to pray for is my Grandma. This year has not been an easy one, and especially not for Grandma. This will be the first Christmas my Grandma will be having on her own, yes she will be surrounded by family, yes she will have people there all the time, but it is the first Christmas without Grandad there too.

It has been hard on my Grandma to adjust to being on her own now, as someone who cared for my Grandad for many years she often finds herself at a lose end and not knowing what to do. Christmas has always been a busy time of year for us with lots of things happening in our Church and with our family. But for many varied reasons this year has been exceptionally quiet and there has not been much to be getting on with. Because of this my family and specifically my Grandma have been finding it difficult to get in to the Christmas spirit and enjoy the season.

I have prayed that my Grandma and my family find a sense of peace this Christmas through Jesus, that they can remember the good times spent with the family we have lost this year and not find ourselves wallowing in grief. But I prayed not only for my family, but all families, all friends, all parents, all children, anyone who has lost someone this year. I pray that although they will never forget their loved ones that it will become easier for them to remember the times they enjoyed together and know that one day we will all be reunited together in God's glory.

The task which I will be attempting to do today is task number 23. Read Isaiah 9:1-7. Please check back tomorrow to see how this task goes and my thoughts on it. But until then, Merry Christmas.

The long dark tea-time of the soul

A few people who know me in the real world will know that I am a huge fan of Douglas Adams and his work. The title of this post is the name of one of his books that I enjoyed a lot and would recommend everyone reads. However it is not about Douglas Adams or this book that I want to talk about, the reason I mention it is because the phrase sums up how I have been feeling lately.

I have talked in recent days about how I have been struggling to keep on top of my Bible study and prayer life and how this has affected my mood. And when I came to write this the title sprang to mind as a good description of the way I have been feeling.

Since discussing the plans that I feel are in my future with my family things have not been as easy as I would have hoped. Relationships with various members of my family have deteriorated and I feel a little like a fire fighter trying to put out a forest fire with a tiny water pistol. I know God will help me but over the last week or so I have seen a number of potential barriers looking like they are about to come down and make things very difficult for me to overcome. I know that I should not be doing this on my own and it is not my plan I am following, I just need to have faith and do what I know I should be doing.

In other news I will be running an advent challenge for myself in the run up to Christmas which I will be posting tomorrow. I will post all the details of the rules and tasks tomorrow, anyone who wants to follow or take part in it themselves feel free to do so and let me know how you are getting along with it if you do.

Loneliness

Last night I was sitting doing some thinking about the future. The result of this was that I managed to get myself slightly depressed. This is mainly because I am feeling quite lonely at the moment. I live a long way from my friends at the moment, I have few people to talk to here where I live and no one at the moment who I feel I can call on whenever I need someone. The other thing is that I am very aware that the path my life is taking means that this is not going to change for the better any time soon. In fact it is most probably going to get worse.

I know this sounds a lot like self pity, and in a certain sense it probably is. I also know that the times I feel like this are moments when I am about to make significant steps in the direction God wants me to go. I am aware that the enemy is going to do everything he can to put me off following God, trying to put me off folloing the plan for my life. The thing is, although I know these feelings are the result of an attack I also know there is an element of truth in them which makes them that bit more powerful. I am not naturally someone who enjoys being isolated and alone. I do like to have my space from time to time but I love being surrounded by friends and loved ones.

I know that whatever my lot in life I should be happy in it, I have a lot more than most people. Although I have been through some rough patches I have sailed through life relatively unscathed. I know that I will receive everything in life that I need at the time that I need it and that I need to wait with patience. But patience is something that I'm struggling with at the moment. I want to run headlong into these plans and want everything now. I have been told by a few people now that I should take some time to reflect on things and proceed prayerfully, and I know they are right. But just because I know that that is the way I should be does not change the fact that I am an impatient person.

I know that life will turn out for the best if I just hand it over to Him. I know that no matter what my thought and feelings about the plan are it is infinitely better than any plan that I could come up with. Patience is a virtue, or so I am told, and it is something that I need to work hard on to develop. I know these feelings will go away in the next few days, but it does not mean that because I know this they will be easier to deal with. I know God will help me battle these daemons and together we will overcome, until then I just need to pray for strength.

We will remember them

They went with songs to the battle, they were young.
Straight of limb, true of eyes, steady and aglow.
They were staunch to the end against odds uncounted,
They fell with their faces to the foe.
They shall grow not old, as we that are left grow old:
Age shall not weary them, nor the years condemn.
At the going down of the sun and in the morning,
We will remember them.
     Laurence Binyon's

Today marks the 92nd anniversary of the end of the fist world war. The Great war as it was called, the war that would bring peace to our time. Or so people thought. And yet here we are nearly a century on still fighting wars the world over.

My Paternal Grandfather was born not long after the end of WWI and lived through the troubled times of the aftermath and then WWII. During WWII his job at the coal face was deemed too important for him to fight yet the stories he has of the war on the home front were still chilling and poignant. My other Grandfather however was an RAF engineer, working on Spitfires and Hurricanes during WWII. Keeping these planes flying was of paramount importance in England surviving the war.

In these wars and the many that followed it many people have lost their lives fighting for freedom and as the politicians claim "peace". Yet still we fight on. Yes on a day like today we should remember the servicemen who have served, who have fallen or been injured fighting for their country. The job they do is one that requires bravery and courage. We should not only remember the soldiers though, we should remember everyone involved. Be they support staff or civilians, these wars impinge on many many lives, even those not directly involved. The families of soldiers left behind at home or left bereaved by wars. We should remember everyone affected by war and the problems it causes.

But we should not forget the hope that was held throughout all this time, peace. It is an aim worth holding on to, an aim as Christians we should strive daily towards. For it is not by war that we will achieve peace, but through love. Jesus commanded us to love thy neighbour, and we are more than aware that by neighbour Jesus meant our fellow man. We need to remember that we are all God's creations, that He loves us all. Let's show our love to everyone, lets strive for the peace that this can bring.

Matthew 19:26 (NIV)
     Jesus looked at them and said, “With man this is impossible, but with God all things are possible.”

At the going down of the sun and in the morning,

We will remember them.

What does Jesus mean to you?

This is an incredibly personal question and it is going to be different for pretty much everyone. I am not sure how well it will work but I have had an idea for something to try with this post. The Church I am a member of has a tradition of testimonies, where members of the congregation will stand up and talk about how Christ has and is working in their lives. I would love it if people would do something similar with this post. My idea is that anyone who wants to can write a post using the same title and in the same vein as this post and then link them back to each other. I think this would be a great exercise to see how Jesus is working around the world in many different lives and lifestyles.

Well to start off let me tell you a bit about myself. I am 24 years old and I am currently living in the north of England with my parents. It hasn't always been so great though.

My childhood was great, I had everything I could ever ask for, I had loving parents and was brought up in a warm and welcoming Christian Church. School bored me but somehow I always managed to come away with the highest results and once I finished it was off to University for me.

For me this is really where I consider that my life began, for the first time in my life I was living away from home doing what I wanted. I had decided to study Physics at Uni for two reasons, the first was that I was very good at it, the second is that it annoyed a lot of people back home. I say I had a happy childhood and that the Church I grew up in was warm and welcoming, but I never felt any attachment to it other than family ties. Because I had no relationship with God at this point in my life I felt no desire or reason to stay in the Church. Subsequently I stopped attending and fell into some bad habits.

My first day at Uni so easily could have been the beginning of an epic love story, within 5 minutes of arriving at my induction I had met a beautiful girl and fallen head over heels in love. After a short chat and an impromptu pub date we arranged to go on our first real date. Everything went really well, date followed date, we spent all our time together and within weeks we had realised we were falling for each other quite hard. In meeting this girl I also had some great excuses to avoid going home and attending Church. We spent as much time as we could together and if that meant not seeing my family or going to Church then it was a price I was willing to pay.

Over the next 2 years things just kept getting better, we had done the meet the parents thing, moved in together and were in our minds very happy. And so we began planning for the future, if we were going to be together I would have to meet her whole family and that meant travelling abroad. So we packed our things and flew half way around the world to meet her whole family. Again things went well, I was accepted into the family and had an amazing time relaxing and being a tourist. And just before I left to go home again, we got engaged.

We knew our families would not be happy about this as we were still at uni and had a lot of work to do in order to graduate. So we decided to wait to tell people until we were finished Uni, we were together, we were happy, waiting was no problem at all.

My partner had been ill for most of the time we were together and I did a lot to look after her and unfortunately on our return to the UK she became worse. This period of time tried my patience, tested my love and drove me to breaking point a number of times. But each time we would get through it and become stronger for it.

That was until she gradually started to feel better. With her illness my partner had dropped out of Uni and wanted to study something different, something where she could make a difference to people. So off she went back to uni and she seemed very happy. Also at about the same time we were both laid off by the company that had employed us and we took on new jobs working for a brewery. With everything that had changed we had very little time with each other but we knew it would only be for one more year.

The stress however began to tell and with her recovering health my partner was evolving into a new person. And although we could both see it neither of us wanted to admit we were growing apart. After over 4 years my partner decided enough was enough, she had met someone else and wanted to move on.

This was possibly the hardest moment of my life so far for me, I had lost everything. I had no relationship with my family, no house to live in, no partner and I had no friends in the city in which I lived. This was possibly the lowest I have ever felt. The one thing left in my life was the job working for the brewery, and that only made my troubles worse.

So tail between my legs I went home, and moved back in with my parents. I still wanted nothing to do with the Church and spent as little time with my family as I could. I spent all my time working and mourning what I had lost. My family knew there was a problem and quickly worked out that I needed help. However I refused any and all help, I just didn't care anymore.

The one positive that came out of that summer is that my Mum dragged me to Church every Sunday. I ignored everything there though and just played on my DS or phone. However slowly I began to pay attention, at first to the music, then the words and eventually the sermons themselves.

So that summer came and went and it was time for me to return to finish my last year at Uni. I found myself a small flat to live in and went back with the aim of rebuilding my life. If only it was so easy to do that. Time and again one after the other I was dealt body blows that would be difficult to get over. I lost my job, lost all but 1 of my friends and had the spectre of my ex hanging round constantly.

However the first weekend I moved back to Uni I found myself sat in a Church. I had no intention of going at all, I just wanted a walk to clear my head, yet there I was. I instantly felt at home, accepted and welcome. It sounds sad but it was one of the best feelings of my life. Over time this Church became like my family, I have a lot of friends there and it is still one of the places where I feel my happiest and most comfortable. Since I began attending there my life has picked up. In fact it is better now than it has ever been, I am truly happy, from the inside out.

So much has happened since then and most of it is documented here in this blog or will likely be in the future. And if I talk about it all this blog post would become an even bigger monster than it is.

But why is all this relevant to the question I asked?

The answer is simply that Jesus saved me.

And its not just in the spiritual sense of the born again Christian. Jesus took me from the darkest place and held me. He showed me love, peace and happiness. He showed me there was a life worth living. I don't think many people know quite how far I fell or how hard it has been to get back on top and start living again. But Jesus does, and it was by His strength that I made it back. In this brief overview I have missed a great deal out that has little bearing on the main point of the story. I fell and Jesus lifted me higher. Many times during my time at Uni I was involved in sinful activities and evil ways. But Jesus saved me from that sin too.

Jesus gave me my life back and gave me a reason to live. A reason to wake up in the morning and get out of bed. And because of this I want Him to have the whole of my life. It is not mine and has never been, even if I thought otherwise. He has just entrusted me with it for a time. He wants me for a task and now I want to go do it. All because Jesus is everything to me. I am not perfect and don't always do what is right, but I sure do try to and I want to follow His plans for me.

I hope this has not been too long or depressing for people, but I hope you take it for what it is. If you want to join in my experiment do not feel you have to write a huge post. Just write what Jesus means to you, if you want to include why then that is great too.. I hope people do join in with this, if you do please send me the link as a comment or on jerrathorn@gmail.com so that I can post it below. All I ask in return is that you link to this post in your response, thanks.

Check out the people who have already posted on this title.

Too much of my self

So yesterday morning I complained and winged about traffic and having a horrible commute to work. I talked about how by praying I was able to find a sense of calm and not cranky and agitated. For me this is a small victory in the fact that I made the choice to pray about it because not long ago I would have tried to deal with it alone.

On the other hand, I did not stop to consider or pray about the situation as it affected other people. And when I found out the extent of the incident I really wish I had. Don't get me wrong, I am pleased that I have managed to grow to the point where I am beginning to consider God as a part of all of my life and not just at certain times. But saying that I want God to be in my life more, I want to be able to say that everything is shared with God.

The incident that caused all of this was the discovery of a dead body in the city centre less than half a mile from where I work. When I found this out I felt very self absorbed and selfish. I know there was no way for me to know that this is what happened but it did alert me to the fact that I had not prayed for the incident only that I would get to work ok and remain calm. Before anyone says don't be too hard on yourself or anything along those lines I am not looking for sympathy or anything here. It is just an observation that I have had that there is still along way for me to go in getting to where I want to be in my prayer life. And even once I get to where I want to be, there is a longer journey ahead for me to continue on.

We all know that we are on a continuing path with God. That there is no such thing as a final destination in this life, we must always struggle on. The key is to remember we are walking with Him and He will always be there to help us if we ask. My minister once said to me, "I don't worry about those who know they have a long way to go, it is the one's who think they have arrived that we need to worry about". Where are you in your life? Do you think you are all you should be? Do you think you have arrived? If you do stop and ask God, what is it I should be doing now?

Listening

It is amazing what you can hear if you are listening. It is even more amazing what you sometimes hear when you are not. This beautiful photo is in my opinion one of the best I have ever taken, and it has a great story behind it. 2 years ago while in Hong Kong with my then girlfriend we were visiting Victoria Peak. It is beautiful up there and is a place that is now tinged with sadness for me, however that is another story.

Anyway while up there looking over the amazing city panorama and soaking in the atmosphere we went for a little wander. All of a sudden I heard a beautiful piece of bird song, in the bustle and noise of the city to me it sounded crystal clear. I mentioned this to the people I was with and they told me I was mad, there was no way I could hear a bird singing above the noise. Undeterred and trusting my ears I wandered towards the sound and after walking only a short distance I came upon a quiet area clear of people. It was then that I saw this beautiful bird just sitting singing away. I took several photos and even managed to film it for sometime before I was found and the bird disturbed. The people I was with were amazed that I had heard the bird from over 100m away and pinpointed its location. I explained to them that being a country boy I was used to hearing birds regularly and the absence of bird song for me was unusual. That because my ears were tuned to listening to bird song I could detect it amongst all the drones of the city.

This does not just work for birds, we can tune ourselves to listen for many things, don't believe me just drop a coin in the middle of a busy city street and count those that turn around. As Christians we should be tuning ourselves to God, tuning ourselves to listening for Him amongst the noise of the world. When we can do this we will be able to hear God calling to us even when the world is screaming as loud as it can. The way to do this is the same way I leaned to hear bird song, by spending time surrounded by it. If we emerge ourselves in God's presence as often as we can, on a regular basis we will become more tuned to hearing His voice.

This photo brings back such memories for me, possibly one of the most enjoyable holidays I ever had. And yet when I look at this photo I now feel only sadness of a life and a love lost. But God works through all things and I love the fact that God can teach us lessons when we least expect them and using things we would never think of. Like I said I love this photo for the amazing memory it holds for me and the lesson that it taught me, but it also reminds me of another lesson I had to learn too, and that hurts. Even so I know God can bring joy from sadness and I look forward to seeing how that works out for me in the future.

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I just could not think of a name to give this post. No matter what I thought of it just didn't seem right. To be honest I am not quite sure how to start this blog either.

Today I was at a funeral. I never met the man and I know almost nothing about him at all. It was exceptionally sad and I am not ashamed to admit I was almost brought to tears at a number of points. There were very few people at the funeral and for me that made the sadness of the ceremony more poignant. During the whole service I could not take my eyes of the man's son, he looked to be only about 10. This young boy at such a young age has been through so much, a broken home and losing his dad to drugs. I was amazed by this young boy as he led the funeral precession walking in front of the hearse and then leading the coffin in to the chapel.

While sitting through the funeral I thought about all the evil in this world, all the senseless and needless hurt and destruction. I thought of how many people are hurting in this world with no knowledge of the Saviour who came to die for them. How many people die without ever knowing how much Jesus could do for them. Not only that but how many people out there have lost someone close and have no consolation from our Heavenly Father.

As I sat in the chapel this afternoon I prayed through almost the whole service for the young boy and the father he has lost. I prayed that God would comfort and guide this young boy as he heads into a life without his dad a life which must seem very dark for him right now. But not only that I prayed for the soul of the dead man and the friends of his I accompanied to the service that they may learn from his mistake and try to make positive changes in their lives. Since starting my job working with these people in such need today was easily the hardest so far. And yet am am so glad God has put me in a position where there is so much good to be done, it has not been easy and will not be in the future. But then who said being a Christian would be easy.