Last night I had a long drive home, after spending a few days with friends I drove home. I guess for some people a 2 hour drive is not a huge drive but it is much longer than I am used to and my car does not like to be driven that far. It is a constant battle to keep it going straight, the accelerator is not in a comfortable position (which leads to cramp) and for some reason the heater has only two settings, too hot or too cold.
Well enough of the complaining. So I was driving home and the road was strangely quiet, one reason was that it was late at night, another was the weather was very cold and there was ice everywhere and there were few people stupid enough to drive on it and perhaps the third was that there were signs everywhere announcing that the road was closed after a certain point. I know this road well having drove up and down it countless times in the last 10 years and I could not work out where the signs were telling me the road closed, the road number they were using I could not place. So I decided to drive north and when the road closed I would then try and figure a way to get back home from that point as the only other road I could have used from my start point was also closed (thanks Highway Maintenance).
The result of all of this was that for the main part I was driving on this 3 lane motorway almost alone, I saw very few other drivers at all. And while this allowed me to get home about 45 minutes quicker than usual ( possibly I was driving a little faster than I usually would) It also gave me an amazing chance to sit in a kind of peace that I don't often find. Even though I live in the countryside I don't often find myself without another person in sight, surprisingly the countryside can be quite a busy place at times. But here I was driving along in the middle of nowhere and could not see any vehicle for miles in either direction. So I switched off the music, turned down the heater (which was just blowing cold anyway) and sat in my little bubble of peace.
While I was sat there I had quite a good little chat with God, I told him about my week and thanked Him for making it so enjoyable, I talked to Him about how the plan for my life was coming along, and then spent the time waiting for an answer. It was a beautiful night, clear skies, full moon and almost everything covered in frost crystals which gave them an amazing glittering glow which looked beautiful. And while I was appreciating that view a simple phrase came into my head.
"How can I help you?"
Now recently I have been going about doing loads of things that I feel will prepare me for the journey I have ahead of me, every opportunity to do something in my Church or to help someone at work or even one of my friends I jump at the chance. But there is always that sense of me trying to control these things that I am doing, controlling the direction that they are going in. I have become aware that although not totally lacking, I need to have a more servile nature. Rather than asking "what needs to be done" I need to take the time and effort to ask "What do you need done?". Whether this question is directed at God or at people I know in each circumstance I don't think is important, but asking the question and acting on the response is certainly something I need to be doing.
This blog is supposed to be, as much as I can, my daily journey through life as a Christian. I hope it to be my thoughts and feelings on life but be as grounded in the Christian message as it can. My intention is not to create a daily readings or bible study guide but to look at my life in terms of a Christian trying to find and follow God's mission using his Life User's Manuel AKA the Bible.